First post - do I have anything in my teeth?

Unlike most men I've ever dated, my keyboard doesn't care if I have any spinach in my teeth. There is some of the same anxiety, though. Will he (or the readers) think I'm funny? Is that schmutz on my shirt? (Did I pick the right template?) Will he call again? (Will anyone subscribe to my RSS?)

While starting a new blog is a bit more of an investment than a first date, I think that's more instructive about how easy dating can be than anything else. To put it simply: if the mere thought of asking someone out makes you want to crawl under the covers and pretend that you couldn't be less interested, you're doing it wrong.

When dating becomes part of your reality, you're inevitably compelled to think about your expectations. Some people will even ask you straight on that first encounter what it is you're looking for - and, while I used to be annoyed by this question, I realize now that it's coming and for you, dear reader, I've decided to answer this question before you even ask.

DATE is not a system. It is the voice of experience. I may say any number of things that sound like rules (i.e., don't have more than two drinks on the first date), but they shouldn't be thought of as rules. These are merely observations on dates that go well - or, the opposite of dates that didn't. (Side note- true story: I had to take a break in the middle of writing that paragraph to finish setting up a date.)

There's also no moral judgment here. DATE is half shared experience and half advice column (so send those questions!) and you can expect fair treatment as long as the things you want to talk about are safe and legal. There's also no moral judgment behind one of my cardinal pieces of advice: pants must be worn at all times on the first date (which, just like all of you, I've sadly broken). This will warrant its own post in the near future, but I assure you, it's only practical dating advice.

That is, assuming you want to get to the second date. DATE assumes you're single or available (a distinction that, too, will get its own post) and that you treat dating like an activity (or that you'd like to). I'm a major advocate of dating as a life activity. It's something between spending every Friday night alone and rushing down the aisle. Again, DATE isn't a system, and I'm not holding out on a secret for trapping the perfect guy or gal. My attitude is that every successful relationship starts with...you guessed it, the date. So let's just focus on that step, all right?

DATE does offer simple, straightforward, specific and pragmatic advice. The date needs to be broken down to the micro level, but in a way that doesn't make you crazy. I've done the evaluating, and now, after a lot of frogs, I'm working on kissing some princes, and I want you to take that journey with me.

One date at a time.